We have not had any contact with my step-children (who are adults, with children of their own) for several years, and have — unfortunately — given up any hope of reconciling with them. We read with great interest Karen Woodall’s blog: rebuilding your relationship with your alienated child. (https://karenwoodall.wordpress.com/2015/05/03/rebuilding-your-relationship-with-your-alienated-child/)
Our biggest roadblock to any possible reconciliation? “Reframing of their understanding of the past, in which they begin to see that their behaviours were not based on fact but on what they had been lead to believe were facts.”
Even though we haven’t seen or spoken to the children in years, the alienating parent continues her campaign of alienation to this day, with numerous postings on the internet about us, our situation with the children, etc. We’ve heard from several sources that her posts have recently escalated, becoming more frequent and more disturbing. She goes so far as to post so-called quotes from me. If she’s going to the extreme measure of posting made-up “quotes” on the internet, you can only imagine her behavior in the privacy of her own home.
This is our story of parental alienation: we have a parent who has successfully alienated her children from their father; yet, she is still compelled to continue the alienation — complete with fabricated stories and imaginary quotes. Why does she feel the need to keep the alienation ongoing? Perhaps she’s worried that, should she let down her guard, the children may attempt to contact their father?
According to her online posts, the children have no relationship with their father because I’ve kept him from them. I’ve also kept his entire family from them. I’m not quite sure how I could have even accomplished that, but that is how our alienating parent paints the picture of her children’s estrangement from their father.
How does one successfully reach these children with the truth? We started a page on this blog about our Journey Through Parental Alienation (which can be found through the link on the left hand side of this page). This is a small sampling of what we’ve gone through over the past thirty years. We didn’t want this to become a “he said — she said” situation, so we purposely shared many of the actual documents dealing with our relationship with our alienating parent. Does anyone, after reading the rants and raves of our alienating parent, honestly believe her children have no relationship with their father because of me? Do the adult children honestly believe that?
We always held out hope that, with time, the adult children would accept the reality of the situation. And the reality is: they were successfully alienated from one parent, by the other. And you’ll notice how we use the past tense: we always held out hope. Unfortunately, we are no longer holding out hope, because we really see no reason to ….