So many parents say: “I’m putting my children first” after a divorce, but in actuality, how many honestly do that?
How many parents put their own feelings of anger, jealousy and loneliness aside and nurture their children’s relationship with their former spouse? The wants and needs of the grown adult parent should not be put before the wants and needs of children who are simply trying to grow up in today’s world as best they can. Making it more difficult for them by keeping them from a loving, caring parent is one of the worst things a parent can do …… yet it happens so often.
I watched first hand as an incredible father was denied a relationship with his children for many, many years. The mother always pretended to put her children first. But what was she protecting them from? A father who loved, supported and cared about them? There was no need for “protection” from this hard-working, dedicated father. Obviously, the mother was more concerned about her feelings, which is the only reason the children were kept from their father. She was angry. She was jealous. She was lonely. For those reasons — and those reasons alone — the children were not permitted to see their father for extended periods of time.
It’s time for our courts to overhaul the theory of “best interests” of the children when there is no reason for the children to be kept from one parent due to the anger and insecurities displayed by the other parent.
It’s time to honestly put the children first!